I just couldn't believe that the woman from Focus magazine here wanted to interview me about my art. She cancelled and rescheduled twice and finally on Saturday evening she came to my house because she wanted to see more of my work.
Now I'm still a bit sick to my stomach because I have no idea what I told her. She asked questions for two hours and we talked and I was so comfortable with her. She said it would be a small article about my paintings. We got on the subject of how I started painting and I told her that after my son died, I dreamed over and over again that I could paint him. Recreate him on canvas. I saw every hair on his head as I painted in my dream. It was cathartic and a real gift to be able to see him in that way after he died. Anyway, that is what we talked about mostly after that. She took photos of me with my five brother's charcoals that I did and then she did one of me and the painting I did of Brian and then we went onto the front porch and she took a bazillion it seemed of me with different paintings on the porch. Sigh I wish I had had a recorder so I'd know what I said exactly. When I get on the subject of my son, well, I don't know anything else. I want in all ways to honor Brian when I talk to people about him. I feel it is a gift I am giving if I talk about my son but if I talk to someone who isn't really interested, I feel terrible, like I dishonored my son in some way by talking to someone who really wasn't interested or didn't care. She seemed like she really cared and I went off at the mouth. LOL Of course (DUH) it's her job to care or appear to. She has a son and she got tears in her eyes several times during the interview. I hope she treats it honorably in the paper though. I don't know what that means but I hope I don't feel sick to my stomach after I read it like I do now. I planned to keep the subject on my paintings and in truth I didn't talk as much about my paintings as I did about my son.
I want a playback but I won't be getting it. I didn't ask any questions. I don't know when the article will come out. Bill is right. If someone meets me they know my life within an hour. Two hours, well, it's probably amazing what I can do in two hours. LOL I will let you know when I see it how she treated this piece of my life that is my soul. Jeni is my heart and Brian my soul. I never want to do them harm.